How the Grinch Stole America

by Chris Baral (with inspiration from and admiration for Dr. Seuss)

Every hoo down in Hooverville liked their country a lot,

But the politicians, and Wall Street and the corporations did not…

Yes, they hated their country, no one quite knows the reason, Perhaps if they told us it might even be treason!

It could be they lean way too far to the right, It could be perhaps that the budget’s too tight,

But I think the most likely reason of all, may be that their hearts are two sizes too small…

But whatever the reason, their heads or their heart, they work on these plans to tear things apart…

Staring down from their perches with a grimace and frown, as the once lighted windows go dark in the town…

“All those hoo girls and boys haven’t seen anything yet! Why we’ll put all their families In debt, debt, debt. debt!”

“These hoos, they want jobs,” they snarled with a sneer, “but we’ve outsourced them all haven’t we made that quite clear?

An honest day’s pay is a thing of the past, We’ll pay pennies on the dollar in China!”, they sassed!

“Why we’ll clean out their icebox, Why we’ll raise their food prices! Let’s speculate wildly, Let’s chop, slice and dices!

And then with no cash and no food in the fridge, they’ll have to shop Walmart, or how else can they live?”

Then they got an idea, an awful idea! a terribly rotten idea we must fear!

“Why for about eighty years, we’ve lived the New Deal, We can work out a plan to destroy and repeal!

We can bust all their unions, drain their 401K’s, abolish their pensions, and that’s just the first phase!

We’ll convince all those hoos to hold tight to their purses, lest they be robbed by those teachers and nurses!

Then we’ll privatize everything, their parks and their schools, we’ll leave them with nothing, those miserable fools!

Let’s abolish Glass Steagall, we’ll wheel and we’ll deal, make it perfectly legal for the banks now to steal!

What with credit default swaps and a mortgage subprime, we’ll convince all those hoos of a plan so sublime!

We’ll get every darn hoo into deep, deep, deep trouble! They’ll buy millions of homes and create quite the bubble…

Then the bubble will burst, but by then it won’t matter, their lives for the most part will be torn and in tatters!

and we’ll have sold all those loans and insured them to boot, we’ll destroy all of Main Street and make off with their loot!

We’ll convince the whole world that these horrible hoos were reckless and greedy and they deserve now to lose…

and when we’ve robbed them all blind and we’ve left them all reeling, we’ll hold them all hostage and not lift the debt ceiling!

We’ll fill their small heads with the media lies, and then we will feed them, a satan sandwich… with fries!

We’ll plunder and purge but let’s not stop there, we’ll take social security and then medicare!

We’ll call them entitlements who cares that you’ve paid? Pull yourself up by your bootstraps you should all be self made!

Like our masters of Wall Street and our corporate shills, our billionaires and their lobbies bribing Congress with bills…

The Supreme Court can rule with an argument feeble that while you and I breathe, corporations are people!

We’ll continue to fight in illegal wars, because war profiteering works for Standard and Poor’s…

Let’s put people in jails throw them in for the max! We can do all this and more without raising a tax!

Gush oil in Gulf water, global warming? No chance! Then when nothing will grow, we’ll plant nuclear plants!”

And when they had plundered just about all of the stuff, from somewhere in Hooverville, a voice said, “Enough!”

At first it was quiet, too quiet to hear, but then it grew louder and then it grew clear…

The hoos had all gathered below hand in hand, “We’ll take back our country, we’ll take back our land!

It may be a struggle but there’s too much at stake, our hoo sons and daughters deserve a fair shake!”

So let’s gather together to work out a plan to bring social justice and peace to our land…

One hoo, two hoo, we must all be aware that the world can’t live on if we don’t learn to share…

In numbers, there’s power Dr. Seuss proved it’s true and that even an elephant can hear a small hoo!

You too?

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